Here’s one we don’t see every day on the gridiron. Somewhere, on a football field near you, a parent just bailed on his kid during a Pop Warner game. We’ll leave our judgment at the door.
As you can imagine, more details are needed. Did the parent have an emergency to get to? Maybe they’re headed to scoop up a nice, hearty post-game meal that wipes the little tiger out after such an exhausting evening.
Nope. Those excuses would have been acceptable, perhaps even celebrated in some cases. Instead, what this father chose to do took a much different turn. He simply didn’t like what he witnessed, saw his opportunity with a bit of extra commotion at halftime, and just left. He didn’t come back and he never planned to. The coach later had to give the kid a ride back home to a very, very disappointed father.
“Listen, he’s no Manning. You saw him out there. I’ve already sat through too much disappointment from him this season. This kid’s got no heart and he’s soft as hell. I heard one guy, near where I was sitting, tell him to stick to Legos. Between you and me, I couldn’t agree more. This kid’s got no future and you know what? I blame his mother.“
“Are you kidding me? I put in nine fucking hours of work, dealing with my asshole boss, then I have to bust my balls to get to this shitty place, night after fucking night, just to watch my son put forth no fucking effort at all?”
He insisted on continuing… “Like, what are we doing here? How did he even make the team? Who’s coaching these assholes? Pardon my language, I’m not usually like this, but this is complete bullshit. Someone has to do something, and it’s time I stand up for every parent out there without a voice. I know my kid won’t keep getting away with this. So, yeah, you know what, I left, and I’ll fucking do it again.”
Wow, well, the language is a bit much here, and for the record, Pop Warner rules regulate that there are no tryouts, and everyone makes the team. So, as bad as this clumsy creature may be at football, his dad won’t be getting his wish of his son getting cut from the team any time soon. He might have to keep toughing these horrific evenings out, “night after fucking night.”
To some, what this random father did may sound distasteful. He may not have handled some aspects well, but to others, in some ways, his act could inspire an entire nation. One that is sick and tired of sitting through pathetic performances, night after fucking night.
What say you, is it time to start a trend of going home at halftime (or sooner if you’re stuck with a REALLY bad dud)? Chances are, you wouldn’t be the first, and you won’t be the last.
For parents who gasped when reading this, you should know there are thousands of other disappointed adults out there just like you, who are sick and tired of sitting through pathetic performances night after fucking night, but no, we haven’t, like, ditched our kids at the ball game or anything, not completely anyway. But we’ve thought about it. A LOT.
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Harvey Ballbanger loves to shoot the shit. If he were bigger, he’d probably be a baller. Hell, if he hadn’t gotten a wing clipped, he’d be Ballbangin’ for the NFL right now, messing around with triple-doubles in his downtime in the NBA. But that isn’t the case. Instead, Ballbanger’s letting it all hang out, delivering fresh piles, from one throne to another.
